I don’t why I’m surprised but I am. Much-leaked and readily seen everywhere before last night, the new away and third strips were unleashed on an unsuspecting public. Well, I didn’t expect it until I saw Hector Bellerin’s tweet that he was off to the launch.
Anyway, with a photo of the Hollywood sign as a backdrop, the players waltzed out in the finery – and I will say both look fine kits, before you ask – in front of an adoring but hand-picked crowd.
I think I’m surprised we hired somewhere. Or Puma did at least. The way our summer’s been, it strikes me that we would probably have taken the shots in a hotel room and photoshopped the backdrop on. Perhaps this where our transfer funds are going?
Anyway, here’s what they look like:
Clap hands, here comes Santi…
Or not, as the case may be. A ludicrous morning in the media today. Alexandre Lacazette is back on with Arsenal set to bid £35m for the striker. Or not, as the case may be. This, you recall, is a player valued at £42m by his club so not that much difference and certainly not enough to stop agreement being reached, you would have thought.
Actually, if you’d thought about it, you’d probably come to the conclusion that this is not going to happen, particularly since the same reports are adamant that we will not pay a penny over £35m for the player. It’s a short call:
Hello Jean-Michel, it’s Dick. £35m for Lacazette, we’ll send the paperwork over.
Well, we only want to pay £35m so I guess that’s it
Short and sweet.
Elsewhere, we’re in talks with Valencia over Shkodran Mustafi – still. These conversations have been going on for so long that I think Dick is at one end of an empty can and a very long length of string, listening to what’s being said. Yes, you remember those conversations when you think you can hear someone by the medium before you realise that they are stood so close you can actually hear what they are saying.
From nowhere, or Torino as their supporters proudly call her, Bruno Peres is a new target. Previously linked with Manchester City – and here’s the scratched record moment – the right back is reportedly worth £17m. Right ball park, wrong position. Actually I don’t know if he’s a centre back converted to a right back or a right back who can play centre back but it seems very unlikely.
All of which flippancy is underlined by Per Mertesacker’s social media comments about a twenty goal a season implant from his surgeon. Typical Arsenal really; our one in-form striker is out for the rest of this year.
That the club captain is willing to make light of the situation is reassuring. I don’t think he’d be so light-hearted if there wasn’t something happening although I am not saying he is ‘in the loop’ particularly. He may be aware of supporters desire but putting his head above the parapet with such levity won’t do him any favours, particularly when Arsène gets a verbal kicking for not signing anyone.
Which I feel this sunny morning, is a sign that things are moving. That’s how bad it’s got Arsène; divination by footballer’s tweets. The depths to which we’ve plummeted.
If you want to be reminded how bad it’s been, read Kim Kallstrom’s story here. It’s a staggeringly damning tale over his signature, even on loan, which underlines the depths to which we slumped in that transfer window. Wonderfully worded by the Swede as well. No wonder he was always a prodigious talent on Championship Manager.
As you’ve guessed, there’s nothing much happening yet still we’ve managed to weasel some words out of it so life isn’t all bad.